Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
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Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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