New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize