he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize