btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
honey bunches of taint.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
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Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
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Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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