just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
