is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
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