Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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