Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize