i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize