He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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