White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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