tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize