I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
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I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
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