Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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