I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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