You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
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