I didn't shave. On purpose
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
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i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
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You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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