I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize