Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry someonesmommy hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.

Fav 28 5532 2162
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(716): View more from New York

I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.

Fav 7 4451 1389
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(316): View more from Kansas

I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(228): View more from Mississippi

Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.

Fav 4 2824 1153
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(+61): View more from Australia

Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.

Fav 13 2404 898
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.

Fav 15 2230 1144
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.

Fav 1 557 305
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(512): View more from Texas

I want to ride his face like a jet ski

Fav 2 79 10
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