so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
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He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
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you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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