how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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