Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize