so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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