Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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