So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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