Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize