we're blogging at a bar
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I feel like death gave me a hand job
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize