WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked and annoyed.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize