If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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