OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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