problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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