so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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