Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
BRING THE BAGELS
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize