he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
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