Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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