oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
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