I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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