I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
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We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
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VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
The Olympian is in my bed
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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