I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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