i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
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