im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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