Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize