So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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