are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
she looked like the before picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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