Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize