We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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