Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
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