i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
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