you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
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i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
A+ Viking dick
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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