Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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