sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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